My Village People Are After My Marriage & My Life-Please Advice II

…Previous Part 

Until last week. I started the fight. It was about him giving me money to get a new hair and he said he does not have the money yet. I insulted him and told him he was not man enough…to the point that I told him he was not good in bed…I said that just to spite him and he looked at me with so much pain and told me to go and look for someone better than him in bed.

Instead of me to calm down, I called my ex…told him I wanted to see him…that it was urgent…that is how I met him in a hotel room I booked and soon as he saw me, he knew my crazy a$$ was at it again…he laughed wickedly and told me I can never be a married woman cos nobody will marry my crazy self. I told him to shut up and  fv-cck me and he did not need a second reminder. I spent the entire day with my ex in bed, smoking and drinking and fv-cck!ng.

Towards the evening, my eyes became clear. My nanny had been calling me but I did not pick up. My husband called me and asked where I was. I stupidly called him on video to show him I was with my ex…nak3-d…he cut the call. When I managed to get myself to go home that night, I was drunk as hell.

On getting home, my husband had packed my things and kept them in the security house and told the security man to throw them away as soon as I showed up. The security man did just that. I was ranting like a mad woman until like 2am…when my husband did not show up…I started crying and begging him.

I have been begging him since that night. I have begged all his family that I turned away to help me beg him but they all do not have pity for me. I am lost cos I have no where to go to. I went back to a hotel and have been there since. I have no money anymore to pay hotel bill. I begged my husband even knelt down on the street as his car drove away everyday in the estate but he told the estate security not to allow me anymore.

I am finished. I called and begged my friend to allow me stay with her but she said she could only allow me one week because her husband would not allow it after learning what I did to my husband…I know I am crazy. I now know I am cursed. But I am begging my husband in the name of God to please forgive me.

My reason for posting this here is because I want him to know that I am ready to do whatever it takes to redeem myself…I have confessed my sins to to him and the whole world. Yes, I humilated my husband…I know I do not deserve him but I am pleading to everyone…please help me beg my husband….please give me another chance…please please…please I need help to manage my anger and abusive nature…please advice me what to do and how to win my husband back.

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